Healthy Lifestyle Changes

Hello.  My name is Jennie Woodruff and I am a problem eater.  What does that mean?  It means that I have a difficult time making healthy food choices for myself.  It means that I eat to feed my emotions and sometimes it means I eat out of control.  It also means that I eat certain foods in secret because I'm worried about having an out-of-control image.
After a family reunion last Summer, I knew I had a serious problem.  We had several activities that participating in was difficult for me.  Horseback riding was humiliating because not only could I not lift my own leg over the horse, but the poor owner had to push me up because I was too weak to do it myself.  I was mortified when I sunburned at the lake.  I hadn't been in a swimsuit for over a year.  All that skin was like bacon in a frying pan.  There were places on my skin that were purple and blistered.  Then there was family picture day.  I avoid having my picture taken for several reasons, but the biggest reason is my appearance.  I was the heaviest I have ever been and I knew it.  I was wearing the biggest clothing sizes I had ever been in and was starting to fill those out.  After the reunion we got our copies of the pictures.  I was mortified and was in tears.  I knew I was big,  but having photographic evidence of my actual body mass was my wake up call.
Okay, so it wasn't my only wake up call.  I was having several and I kept hitting the snooze button.  When I went to the movies and my seat was uncomfortable because it was too tight.  My car was feeling claustrophobic because the walls were closing in on me or rather me on them.  Problems breathing when I had to walk quickly to keep up with the kids.  Not being able to move fast enough to keep my toddler from running through the parking lot.  Snooze button.  My justification was that I wasn't that bad.  It's not like I eat whole cartons of ice cream by myself.  I don't eat five hamburgers in one setting.  I could loose weight anytime I wanted to.  Right?
I truly didn't think I had a problem until I read a book.  "Hungry: Lesson Learned on the Journey From Fat to Thin" by Allen Zadoff.  I had it on my kindle app for a really long time.  I think I avoided reading it because in a way it was admitting that I needed help.  I should mention this is not a self help book.  It is about a man who overcame morbid obesity.  He lost over a hundred pounds and has kept it off.  He labeled himself as a food addict.  In his book he talked about different types of "eaters."  He was an addict and from what he describes, I am a problem eater.  Where I could become an addict if I didn't take control. I really hated how many times I related to what he was saying.  I couldn't possibly be that bad!
I am that bad.  I am at a point where I could have serious health issues if I don't get the weight and my eating under control.  A couple of weeks after the new year, I decided to go ahead and make those changes.  I am not focusing on weight loss and putting my efforts into being healthy.  I have had to remove foods from my "regular groceries" list.  This is a slow journey.  I count calories and exercise daily.  I am making sure my family is eating the right foods as well.  You might have noticed my weigh loss ticker.  I am using it to monitor my progress and to be accountable.  I have made weight loss goals, but only because I feel it will help me make better choices when I put food in my mouth.  So far, I have lost 20 lbs.  I know I have a long way to go, but I am feeling better.  I have more energy and motivation that I have had in a long time.  I am going to use this blog as a type of journal.  I will post my progress and my struggles.  Feel free to comment with advise or encouragement.  I need all the help I can get.  :)